Words Machine.

While we are saving money to fund our IVF procedure, few people also suggested us to try applying for a loan. I'm too hesitant to the idea since we are also paying for our bills. I'm afraid that we won't be able to save due to lots of expenses. Yet, we want to have the procedure done this year and so we tried to grab the opportunity for the loan application.  As a government employee, my husband can loan at state-run banks like Landbank of the Philippines (LBP) and Development Bank of the Philippines (DBP) and government-owned and controlled corporations like the Government Service Insurance System (GSIS). He was told by their Human Resource personnel that DBP offers a credit salary loan (salary deduction) which can be approved as fast as five days (as what DBP promised on its website). The bank can also provide the whole amount needed which is a good thing especially when you need the money asap. Here's the process of how my husband applied for the loan at DBP

A month has already passed after my laparoscopy and my incisions are getting better. There are just times that the incision in my navel area hurts when I move too hard or fast. Nevertheless, I am glad and happy that I am getting well. A week or two after my surgery last January 17, I experienced an EMOTIONAL BREAKDOWN. My husband went back to work after taking care of me for a week so I was left alone in my bedroom. Though I'm living with my parents, having no husband with me every day felt like I have more "me" time. And when I have more me time, I also have more time to be depressed, thinking about what happened—my current situation of having no fallopian tubes anymore, the financial burden of the IVF procedure, the work I left since December, and my thoughts of resigning from work or not for the IVF procedure. These were like butterflies in my mind, flying here and there. I've been crying days and nights, lying on the bed for the whole day. I've been so un

Photo grabbed from:  https://www.express.co.uk/news/uk/ 874170/IVF-news-300-000-children-born-UK-last-25-years I'm not too confident with the idea of asking help (especially if it's about financial) from other people but if there's no pain, then there's no gain. I created a campaign on the Go Get Funding website to humbly ask for financial support in pursuing our plan for in-vitro fertilization or IVF. IVF is our last option for me to get pregnant. It's just so unfortunate that my pregnancy became ectopic and our medicine and hospital bills almost consumed our savings. I haven't shared this much to all my circle of friends but I've been posting the link of our campaign page on my social media accounts. This is just in case anyone with a good heart can read our plea. I would also like to post it here and ask everyone if you could help us fund our IVF procedure which would cost around Php 500,000 or $ 10,000. It's too huge but with every cent of

I mentioned from my last blog  how we need to wait again before the OB-Gyne concludes if my pregnancy is ectopic or not. And now's the final judgement—I have an ECTOPIC PREGNANCY. 💔 Last January 15, I started to feel a very sharp pain in my abdomen and rectal area. I was 9 weeks and 4 days pregnant that time. I thought I was just having a typical constipation. At night, an on and off pain was felt in the left side of my tummy. Since my mind was already killing me thinking about what was really happening inside, we decided to have my checkup scheduled on the next day. My uterus was still empty. We then found the gestational sac which already had a fetal pole, located in my left fallopian tube. I was happy because finally, I saw our little bunny but I was also sad because he/she didn't get a chance to pass through my tube. I tried not to cry. I was looking at DH and I also felt his sadness. The doctor finally confirmed that I was having an ectopic pregnancy. I have to un

Yesterday, DH and I went back to my OB for our follow-up checkup. He was trying to make me laugh by asking what would he'll wear for the day just so our little bunny would show up. That joke hit me hard. I can sense how he really anticipates seeing our baby. Going to the town where the clinic is located is about a 30 to 40-minute drive away from DH's home. It's a bit far but as if I have a choice. At least, someone can drive for me. We arrived around 11 but we got catered by past 1PM. But of course, we had our lunch during the waiting time (which I had my favorite viand—sweet and sour fish! 😍). Upon our return to the clinic, five minutes passed and the secretary called my name. It was another moment of truth! I lay down and my OB started inserting her TVS magic wand. Aaaaaaaaaaaand! No sac was still visible except for my thick endometrium in my 8th week and 5th day. 😪 While she was searching for possible locations, we found something in my left tube. She wasn&

Happy new year, everyone! It's another year to fill with new stories! DH and I celebrated our New Year at his hometown. My family spent theirs at the hospital after my Dad was admitted due to a headache and constant vomiting. Our New Year celebration was not that special because prior to that, I experienced light vaginal bleeding which I thought it was Aunt Flo. I felt scared and worried as it happened all of a sudden. I just talked to our little bunny to stay calm and strong inside. DH was even thinking of a baby name that would mean a fighter. If it's a boy, he'll be called Andrus, and if girl, she'll be Aloisia. 👶 The next day, another bleeding happened again. All I did that time was walking, sleeping, and eating. I was so careful in doing anything so I wasn't really sure why I was bleeding again. I decided to visit an OB the next day. DH's aunt recommended one who has a clinic in the next town. On January 2, 2019, I had my first pregnancy ultrasound

As I mentioned in my last blog , I want to wait for two weeks before getting a pregnancy test (PT). I've read on online forums that the hCG level after a two-week delay of your menstruation is usually high enough to be detected. From my DH's hometown, we went back to Davao City on December 22 to celebrate our Christmas. The next day, I decided to take a PT. After 30 seconds of checking, I didn't see any second line. I felt so devastated. I cried in our room while DH was soundly sleeping. I'm sad not because it was negative but because I don't have enough days to wait for my menstruation to come. I want to make my leave of absence worth it! 😫 Good thing that DH and I, together with my family, took some fresh air outside the city. 😌 We traveled to Compostella Valley for an overnight adventure. It was a moment to escape from the harsh and sad reality I was dealing with. Thank God I enjoyed that adventure so much. When we arrived back at home on December 23, I rem